Tag: relationships

Not What I Wanted to Post

So I am trying to make sure that I post something substantial and meaty at least once a week. On a good week, you may even get some sides with that medium rare steak as I post up smaller tidbits here and there throughout the week.

This week though, it looks like I bit off more than I could chew (and unfortunately contained a chunk of gristle that’s taking more effort to chew down). The topic that’s been a lot on my mind lately requires a lot of thought to put down in a fashion that makes some sense. As it is right now, I have several paragraphs of  incoherent thoughts that are loosely related. Hopefully I will get some time this week(end) to translate it into something you can understand.

Until then, here are some thoughts from a very introspective time in my life a few years ago. These thoughts are what coalesced after coming to the realization that we can either take responsibility and learn from the bad choices and hurt we may have caused to those we care about, or we can continue on in life blaming others and never grow into a better person.

“I’ve made a lot of mistakes in my life; and while I regret the pain they have caused to those I love and care for, I think I have finally come to the point where I regret none of them.

Why?

Some of the biggest mistakes have resulted in some of the best life changes I have made. I feel that eventually, I’ve always been able to learn from them and their consequences to make me a better person or better understand who I am.

I feel for those who never accept and learn from their mistakes. Those that feel they can sweep them under the rug and continue along like it never happened. They lie, twist truths, omit information or justify to save
themselves. They are in truth only lying to and hurting themselves. Preventing themselves from growing into a better person because of it and only leaving the door open to make the mistake again because there
were no consequences the first time.”

(The Sound of) One Man Clapping

Hey all. Welcome to my little experimentation of making my musings about life, love and the nature of the universe available to everyone and everything with an IP address. Here you will find my thoughts on everything and anything that feeds into the ocean of my mind, passes through the chaotic maelstrom of my sub-conscience and finds safe passage through the tumultuous straits of my waking consciousness.

You’ll get to read about my kids; but you won’t get your typical Dad Blog trope here. Love and Relationships? Yup, that also… but more than likely you’ll get to know about the trials, tribulations and joys of being polyamorous and the hard road of discovery to get here. Music; Check. Drumming and performing. Check; check! Motorcycles, riding and gear? Definitely!  All that and a steady dosage of rants, ravings and otherwise random discussions of what is on my mind when I have time to post.

Who am I? Well I am a mid-forties male that has gone through my fair share of life. A life not much different from yours (or yours). I have three kids, a divorce, a decent paying job, house in the ‘burbs and hobbies. I’m also the person that sat down a few years ago and started a deep introspection of myself, my flaws, my wants, my needs and my goals. Why? Because I had reached that point in life that I didn’t want to hurt people anymore; especially myself. & in order to do so, I had to figure out who I was at the time and what I needed to do to make myself a better person.

Am I succeeding? I’d like to think so. I think when you are honest with yourself, it’s a lot easier to be honest with other people. In turn, life and relationships (in all forms) get better. But you can be the judge yourself if I am succeeding or not. Since this blog will be a little self reflection and self documentation of my journey in life; you can let me know how I’m doing.

In return, I hope you can and will find something here that may help you in your journey through the chaos of life; even if it’s just a realization that you’re not alone in the bad and the good that comes our way.

So pour yourself a strong one (I suggest on the rocks, too many calories in mixers), buckle in and hope you can swim! Thanks for joining me and I hope you brought the bottle with you.